Hello tax return! Let me introduce you to my wallet. Unfortunately, I have a feeling that you will not be staying long.

Also, people who refuse to walk on the footpath and walk down the road instead piss me off. Roads are for cars. Footpaths are for unmotorised peoples. And you are a jerk. With tattoos and a scary dog. So as much as I'd like to run you over, I'll refrain from doing so.

p.s. E, you are a mean, mean boy. One does not tell their girlfriend that your newly engaged best friend is visiting Dunedin but you will not accompany them because you have exam study. While I understand the rationale, I would have preferred not to know at all. It's like... hey little dog, I have a nice bone. Oh wait, sorry. You're not getting it.

On horrible days like this, I miss E. terribly.

I am a horrible person.

Need. To. Stop. Toying. With. People's. Feelings.



Also would appreciate it if vegetables make an appearance with my dinner. This may force me to go and eat some fruit because I'm afraid that constipation may be imminent.

Oh, and by the way nombre, you ain't foolin' nobody by closing your door. Might just turn my music up so I avoid hearing any untoward noises...





postscript: I think I just caught them showering together. dfkjsdflkjsdfkjldsfkjl
Shuddering aside, blackmailing material? DEFINITELY. 

Arse is now approximately the size of Beyonce's. Bordering on the size of one of those moonhoppery things that we used to sit on when we were kids.

(just in case you don't remember)

So, I started visiting the gym three times a week. And have weighed myself in the vain hope that within three weeks (and yes, it has been exactly 3 weeks since starting on the 19th of June) of starting my thrice-weekly visits that something might have happened. Alas, no such results yet. 

And my arse muscles hurt. So something should happen. I live in hope that one day I shall wake up and my arse will have shrunken enough so that I may fit my jeans again. 

No no no no no nononononononono.

You SILLY boy. I didn't realise that you had bought me diamonds.



Now I HAVE to read over your essays.
And I am officially a mega-bitch.

So I've decided that I should stop buying clothes. Because it is now to the point that I cannot wear everything at least once. Same goes for nail polish.

Today the pipes were frozen over at work so we had no water. Needless to say, I was immensely amused. Especially since I left the house without voiding my bladder because I was running late.

Have also decided I am refusing to write any more essays.

Also have decided that driving on icy roads are scary. And that for some inexplicable reason, I STILL dislike HER. Even though she's miles away in the North Island. After much thought, I still can't think of a proper reason as to why I resent her so much. Perhaps it's the name. I seem to dislike everyone who has that name. Except that reason is not a particularly good one.
Bah, she's not worth the neurons firing.

I also dislike hermaphroditic couples who are adjoined at the hip.





...I am such a bitch.

Oh, the dreams we have. For house with a room that has a wall made completely of windows. A grand piano sitting in the observatory. A house with a backyard for the dog. Gas powered stoves. If only they were plans and not dreams.