sail away on teary seas
tattoo the times we had
for my memories.

(untitled)

Torturing myself seemed the only way
but what hurt the most was your indifference.
I wondered if anything meant anything
and now I've realised that it all means nothing.

Actions are louder than words.

You'll do the things that you're required of
and invest in so much of your time.
I know the adage is the other way around
but sometimes I wish that your words
would be as loud as the actions that you do.
I thought I made peace with that once
but it seems that it has come back to haunt.
For I live in constant fear that one day
I'll have done too much for forgiveness
and despite the many words that I'll say,
the balance of the scales will tip irreversibly
the other way.

The happiness eater

I'd like to spit on your happiness and joy
for I wish to turn that curve the other way.
The day will come when you are no longer
a child of Sunday and full of blithely goodness
with a reason to have that ridiculous smile.
Until Wednesday comes along with a claim
I shall sit and wait for that day to leave me.

Note to self

must not watch movies even slightly scary before sleeping because going to work after no sleep is horrible.

Caged bird

Only a fool wanders into a cage
no matter how gilded it may be.
So like a caged bird that is caught
I seem to have caused myself grief.
No one sings unless they realise that
their misery is of their own doing.
For I know why the caged bird sings
a lament to its own stupidity
because there is nothing that it can do.

A new year

i almost forgot that the New Year heralds in New Year Resolutions. simply because i make them and then i forget them.
actually i used to something else on the first day of each year which i found a little more interesting. i would write myself a letter, seal it and then open on the very last day of the year. i for one, discovered that i have quite a lot to say to myself, which is funny because i spend a lot of the day talking to myself so you'd think i'd run out of things to say (i really should stop this practice because i get caught quite a lot talking to myself by randoms in public and they give me weird looks).

obviously, i'm not going to post my letter here because i'd rather not share the inner workings of my mind. but i hope you like the idea.